It’s true what they say about never giving up on people. Well, except in Lil Wayne’s case. That man is gone for good – the drugs can have him. I wish him nothing but lumpy shea butter and unresponsive edges.
Still, a silver lining in the cloud of lost causes came through today in form of Prince Harry. Yes, the ginger one who’ll never sit on the throne, but we always found kinda hot and slightly dangerous. Our risqué royal.
You might ask why he was a lost cause to begin with. You’ve clearly forgotten the Great Armband Incident of 2005. When I think of go-to accessories, I pick up a nice bag, some earrings and maybe a bracelet or two. For 2005 Harry, it seemed swastikas were all the rage. Problematic, right?
Today, Harry revealed his ‘woke’ alter ego when he stood up to many members of the media for bullying his girlfriend in the name of journalism.
As a result, Harry was quickly filed away on that dusty shelf reserved for flavourless chicken, Taylor Swift, Amy Schumer and bad twerking. You know – things that I would despise if I cared enough to expend the energy.
But redemption is never too far away. Today, Harry revealed his ‘woke’ alter ego when he stood up to many members of the media for bullying his girlfriend in the name of journalism. If you’ve been living under a rock, you might be unaware that rumours have been circulating about Harry dating Suits actress Meghan Markle. A media storm erupted and Meghan became the focal point of a modern-day reminder that the one-drop rule is very much alive and well. Yes, Meghan is half black. And dating a royal. Cue heart attacks around the world.
It’s pretty hilarious that so many people have been clutching their pearls at the mere prospect of the negrification of the royal family. Not only is Meghan half white, she could pass for Kate Middleton’s tanned cousin, complete with brunetter hair, pencil skirts and cocktail dresses. I wonder how many more arteries would have exploded if Harry got with a Kerry Washington or a Gabrielle Union, or even a Leslie Jones.
Somehow, just being negro-adjacent was enough to cause hysteria. From despicable attempts to draw links between Meghan’s family and crime, to a bizarre obsession with the fact that she is divorced, I have seen the weirdest and most inexplicable uproar to what would otherwise be the simple fact that two adults met and started dating. Instead of being yet another transient story about a celebrity dalliance, coverage of this budding relationship degenerated into thinly veiled jibes at her marital status and race. And Harry wasn’t standing for it.
When people of colour are often made to feel like racially motivated slights and micro-aggressions are all in our head, it’s refreshing to see someone call it out for what it is.
In a statement confirming their relationship, Harry not only identified the treatment meted out to Meghan as harassment but, more importantly, called the media out for the blatantly racist and sexist undertones present throughout recent coverage. This might not seem like a big deal, but when people of colour are often made to feel like racially motivated slights and micro-aggressions are all in our head, it’s refreshing to see someone call it out for what it is. Racist.
So well done, Harry. Historically horrendous decision-making (particularly when it comes to costume choice) aside, you might be alright after all. Don’t push it, though. If you keep this up, I might have to give that Shake It Off girl a chance.