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Women watch porn. We even enjoy it. And it’s just about becoming acceptable to admit it.

Some feminists no longer see the adult film industry as absolute evil and responsible for objectifying women. In fact women now go behind the cameras to tell their own sex stories. The emergence of feminist porn seems to have settled the score for women who were desirable to enjoy erotic entertainment but couldn’t do so because they felt guilty for enjoying something that was apparently demeaning.

I am a black woman who enjoys the depiction of her own desires but cannot find much content to get off on.

But some women still cannot celebrate victory in the long-fought battle for a fairer representation of female sexuality. I am a black woman who enjoys the depiction of her own desires but cannot find much content to get off on.

I started thinking about porn on Christmas day – with no intention of insulting the sanctity of any religious belief. There was good food, good music and great boy talk with two of my black female friends. The conversation was in full swing. It moved on from boy talk to casual sex talk until one of us dropped a truth bomb: ‘So, what about black women in porn?’

Ebony porn is, in short, a trip back to the dirtiest of the dirty south or directed at white men with a black fetish.

The conversation was new to me; I don’t have many occasions to discuss my sexuality with other black women. The thought of black women in porn had never occurred to me up until that moment: I never watch porn with black women in it. Not that I never have, but I never usually do. Given that I am otherwise an advocate of representation, why am I not too concerned with the representation of my sexuality?

A quick visit to a few porn sites reminded me of the reality:

‘Hood pussy is a good pussy’
‘Black Mama Maneater’
‘Chocolate and Brown Sugar’

Perhaps that’s why many black girls only pay a few visits to the ‘Ebony’ section of porn websites. The content is even worse: it’s a lot of booty, it’s a lot of light-skinned women, and it’s a lot of bad weaves. We cannot even enjoy the diversity of porn that mainstream websites usually offer. There are a few things you can expect: the darker the skin complexion and the curvier the body, the more stereotypical and clichéd the plot. Ebony porn is, in short, a trip back to the dirtiest of the dirty south or directed at white men with a black fetish.

The existence of feminist porn shows that there is an audience for erotic entertainment for women.

The mere title of the section makes me cringe. In porn websites categories, white women have the privilege of being sorted in geographic locations, Asian and Latinas are at least described by their ethnicity, but black women are just black. And, although there’s still a long way to go, Hollywood has finally understood that black women aren’t all the same and not all of us have to be loud, sassy and strong. So why can’t the adult film industry can get its act together?

Among my friends, the reaction – ‘It’s porn, what did you expect?’ – was common, regardless of their race, gender, and sexual orientation.

But the existence of feminist porn shows that there is an audience for erotic entertainment for women. And it is part of the sexual initiation of many young adults – whether men or women. The misconceptions created by the online porn industry and the sheer numbers of people who watch it are why we must talk about it more rather than keep it behind curtains of political correctness.

The porn industry is not the target of my rant here; rather it’s the disgusting clichés that porn conveys about black women. The stereotyping of black female sexuality is real. Porn, through its misleading portrayal of sex and sexual relationships, is partly responsible for perpetuating – and overturning – these stereotypes.

To this day, the depiction of the black female body as a mess of limbs and gracious curves prevails. And then, there are stereotypes about black women’s temper and character that translate in how black women’s sexuality is perceived. I am not expecting the porn industry to become righteous overnight, but I am in the right to explore my sexuality without having to fight the wild and curvy beast imagery that sets the wrong expectations about my ‘performance’ in bed. Certainly, black women are not the only victims of misrepresentation in the porn industry. Women are fighting misogyny by directing their own erotica. And there’s a lot of female-friendly porn out there (and some rare examples of black feminist porn). But it would be a mistake to think the problem of Ebony porn is a simple one; one easily solved by making more – and watching more – black feminist porn.

The problem is bigger than porn. Black female sexuality is not just misrepresented; it’s unspoken. I’m used to speaking about sex in front of my French friends’ parents. But I would be mad to mention even a boy in front of my African friends’ parents. There is a culture of secrecy around female sexuality that black communities, whether Western, African or Caribbean, all share. So I only thought it polite to warn my mother about this article.

In part, the secrecy with which we were brought up to treat intimacy has silenced us in discussing these issues. Why is it so hard for our parents to have ‘the talk’ with us? I was initially worried about my mother’s reaction when I mentioned this article. ‘So Mom, I thought I should tell you that I’m writing an article about pornography and black women.’

‘What about it?’ was her first reaction. And then, ‘Oh, that should be interesting’. She later surprised me even more by asking me whether the article would be illustrated.

So is it our shame or our parents’ that prevents us from speaking about our bodies? Either way, we need to speak up: if we avoid talking about our sexual lives, we also avoid speaking of our sexual health.

To deconstruct the stereotypes that haunt us in our intimacy is also about advocating for our freedom of sexual expression. We enjoy men rapping about our ‘pussies’, so what’s preventing us from enjoying a conversation about them amongst ourselves? And if advocating for more black women behind cameras in the adult film industry is part of starting a conversation, count me in.

Photography by Spencer Charles

Creative direction by Marina Skye