This is an open letter to Bonang ‘Beat Face’ Matheba, Slay Connoisseur, Fleek Assassin.
Dear Bonang,
Having searched the lengths of Instagram and breadths of Snapchat, your flawlessness remains a mystery. You have achieved super saiyan fleek. Every picture you post is evidence of your commitment to the absolute annihilation of the game.
How can I not mention the picture that reclassified previous takes on this look as The Basic Gatsby? Only you made it great; took it to the next level.
Then, there was the time the Rihanna anointing was heavy upon you – and we all know anything inspired by the fairy godmother only leads down the road of perfection.
And, of course, if doubt ever manages to creep in and the faithful start to waiver – you remind them that your body isn’t here to play. We see the abs. Our faith is renewed.
I only have one favour to ask. By some manner of sorcery, everything you wear fits you like a glove. So drop a few hints. Share a few pointers. It’s rude to rub our faces in that African butter perfection without showing us the way.
Your silence on the matter is, quite frankly, selfish. The rest of us need space on the internet too.
The late great Michael Jackson took the supreme secrets of weave technology to his grave – secrets which, if shared, could have prevented a multitude of mishaps. Now, many remain afflicted with errant tracks and misplaced lace – catastrophes easily avoided with the right information.
My point is simple: for God’s sake, woman, share.
Until you decide to grace us with your wisdom, however, we will remain observant in the hopes of imbibing your slay via osmosis. We do hope you will reconsider. Soon.
With lots of IG likes,
A fan.
PS. This is also a strong look: